Dirty Pick Up Lines

Friends most welcome to my new post about dirty pick up lines. I specially created this pick up lines collection only for you.

Best Dirty Pick Up Lines

Did you grow up on a chicken farm? 'Cause you sure know how to raise a cock. 

Do you work at Subway? Because you just gave me a footlong. 

Are you a sea lion? Because I can sea you lion in my bed tonight!

I'm no weather man, but you can expect more than a few inches tonight. 

Do you have a mirror in your pocket? (Why?) Because I can see myself in your pants. 

You remind me of my little toe... because I'm going to bang you on every piece of furniture in my home. 

Are you from Iraq? 'Cause I like the way you Baghdad ass up. 

Excuse me, do you believe in one night stands?

Sit on my lap and we’ll get things straight between us.

Girl do you have a shovel in that back pocket? Cause I’m digging that ass!

I like every bone in your body, especially mine.

Guy pulls out a quarter”if i flip this coin what are the chances of me getting head?”

I’m like a Rubik’s Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get!

Nice pants. Can I test the zipper?

Is your name winter? Because you’ll be coming soon.

I could’ve called heaven and asked for an angel, but I was hoping you’re a slut instead.

Can you do telekinesis? Because you’ve made a part of me move without even touching it.

One of my friends told me girls hate oral, do you wanna help me prove him wrong?

Are you a drill sergeant? Because you have my privates standing at attention.

Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore – my face should be among them.

Do you like to draw? Because I put the D in Raw.

Want to see if you can add “has an awesome gag reflex” to your resume?

Are you a drill sergeant? Because you have my privates standing at attention. 

There are plenty of fish in the sea, but you're the only one I'd like to catch and mount back at my place. 

My dick just died. Would you mind if I buried it in your ass? 

I may not go down in history, but I'll go down on you. 

Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package. 

Do you mix concrete for a living? Because you're making me hard. 

That shirt's very becoming on you. If I were on you, I'd be coming too.

Let’s play carpenter. First we’ll get hammered, then I’ll nail you.

I can tell you’re into yoga, why don’t you spend a little time showing me just how flexible you are?

Your smile is almost as big, warm, and lovely as my penis.

Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.

If it’s true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.

Are you a raisin? Because you’re raisin my dick.

I’d love to kiss those beautiful, luscious lips. And the ones on your face.

I`m no weatherman, but you can expect a few inches tonight.

You work at a post office? Cause I saw you checking out my package.

Is there a cellphone in your backpocket? Cause that ass is calling me!

If you jingle my bells, you’ll have a white Christmas

If I was a watermelon, would you spit or swallow my seed?

Wanna play carnival? You sit on my face and I guess how much you weigh.

Call me Chris Brown, cause I’d hit that! [Look at her ass]

I’m not too good at algebra, but doesn’t U+I = 69?

Miss, If you’ve lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?

I may not be a windshield repairman, but I can still fill your crack in. 

Are you a termite? Cause you're about to have a mouth full of wood. 

Are you a middle eastern dictator? Because there’s a political uprising in my pants! 

Are you a farmer? Because you’ve got some big, round, beautiful melons! 

Your smile is almost as big, warm, and lovely as my penis! 

Your face reminds me of a wrench, every time I think of it my nuts tighten up. 

Do you like whales? Because we can go hump back at my place.

Do you believe in karma? Because I know some good karma-sutra positions.

When I saw you, I lost my tongue. Can I put yours in my mouth?

Do you have a shovel? Because I’m digging that ass.

I hope you like dragons, because I’ll be dragon my balls across your face tonight.

Are you an archaeologist? Because I’ve got a bone for you to examine.

Roses are black, violets are red, what is it going to take, to get you into bed?

Nice pants. Can I test the zipper?

Oh, you’re a bird watcher. [Pull out your dong] Well, would you take this for a swallow?

Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under

I might not go down in history, but I’ll go down on you!

Call me leaves, cause you should be blowing me.

Are you a poster? Because I want to pin you on a wall

What are you doing tonight beside me?

My friend over there really wants your number so he knows where to get a hold of me in the morning.

If you're feeling down, I can feel you up. 

Are you from the ghetto? Cause I'm about to ghetto hold of dat ass. 

You know what I like in a girl? My dick. 

Are you a doctor? cause you just cured my erectile dysfunction. 

Your legs are like an Oreo Cookie - I wanna split them and eat all the good stuff in the middle. 

Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? [Pull your pockets inside out] Would you like to? 

I lost my virginity. Can I have yours? 

Did you just come out of the oven? Because you’re hot.

Do you work at Home Depot? Because you’re giving me wood.

Is that a keg in your pants? Because I’d love to tap that ass.

Are you my new boss? Because you just gave me a raise.

You are so selfish. You’re going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night.

Hi, I’m wasted but this condom in my pocket doesn’t have to be.

Let me insert my plug into your socket and we can generate some electricity.

Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you’d be guilty as charged!

Fuck me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist right?

You’re on my list of things to do tonight.

Do you believe in karma? Because I know some good karma-sutra positions.

You Say: I’m jealous of your dress. She says “Why?” You say: Because it’s touching your body, and I’m not.

Lets play titanic youll be the ocean and ill go down on you.

Hey Baby! I'd like to use your thighs as earmuffs. 

Are you a pirate? Cause I’ve got a lot of semen waiting for you. 

You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away. 

Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore - my face should be among them. 

Hey baby, I think you just made my two by four into a four by eight. 

Is that a keg in your pants? Because I'd love to tap that ass. 

Do you have an inhaler? Because you've got ass ma. 

Hey cutie, wanna go halves on a baby? 

I'm like a Rubik's Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get! 

What's the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I don't have a Ferrari. 

Hi, do you want to have my children? [No] OK, can we just practice then? 

I'm afraid of the dark... Will you sleep with me tonight? 

I love my bed but I'd rather be in yours. 

Baby, I'm like a firefighter, I find 'em hot and leave 'em wet! 

If I'm a pain in your ass... We can just add more lubricants. 

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